I hate that I am deliberately missing my Vietnam trip. A few months ago, on a spur of the moment, I booked myself piso fare tickets to Ho Chi Min City. I took the available seats as a sign because they coincided with the Angkor workshop dates perfectly. I applied this year and I was slightly more confident that I'd finally make it. But I did not make it (again) and now I am left with a 10-day trip at the end of November with nothing in particular to do.
I won't go for a number of reasons: One, the Angkor Workshop would take care of my food and lodging and without those, I would be really short of cash. Two, even if I can scrounge up enough for ten days, I am in no mood to move around Indochina alone. Been there, done that. I want company this time. Three, some of my friends whom I told about my booking just in case they'd want to meet up with me after the workshop did book tickets...on earlier dates. Errr, yes. Four, having decided I won't go, I already scheduled fieldwork in Ilocos for those dates.
From the start, I knew it would be a gamble so it's not much of a shock when Angkor emailed me. Still, I'm a bit sad that another opportunity has been jinxed and another ticket shall go unused. Also, I was supposed to go to Batanes with some friends for my birthday. I've been looking forward to it although with some temperance because of a previous devastating canceled Batanes flight experience. When a supertyphoon came on that particular date, even if in my heart of hearts I had an inkling something like this would happen again, it sucked nonetheless.
Now I'm reading about a new international photo workshop in Bangkok for October 2012. And this morning I was tempted to book myself another 12-peso HK or Incheon ticket for March. When will I tire of wanting things so badly and being disappointed in the end? Maybe soon but not yet.